Speed limit year....55

 

Trauma

 Hey y'all.  What's popping?

So I have been in active therapy for a minute.  Finally dealing with my demons and shit. I have realized that in order to move forward, I have to heal that little girl inside.  I also follow this world renowned trauma specialist, Dr. Gabor Mate', and this quote has stuck with me: 

2024...Already?

 Time seems to slip by if you don't pay attention. I'm still in Maryland.  I'm still trying to be purposeful with my connections.  I have been doing things that make me happy, even when others don't agree or understand.  

Mother's Day...Again

 I absolutely hate Mother's Day.  😥

Happy New Year

 I have been meaning to blog for 12 days.  I would think about it, but not be near my computer.  Blogging from my phone is a no go for me...I need to type it out.  

Wind Down Wednesday

Good evening, Bloggers.

It's been a dizzying few weeks.  Work demands and trying to get ready for vacation.  Plus it is now my birthday month.  Yay for May!!!!  So I am going to try to be in here at least once a week to recap the countdown to 49.   I am really excited.

Throwback Thursday

Good morning, Bloggers...

Today, a gem came up in my timehop from 7 years ago.  I remember exactly what was going on in my life when I said this:

Wind Down Wednesday 2019

Hey Family!!!  Boy have I missed you....Well a bunch has changed since I was last here.
Let's see...

The object invoked has disconnected

I just need to get away from my thoughts.  Some days I think I am ok, then I get a reminder that I am mentally fragile.

Indigo

I was living in Atlanta in 2009.  I had seen her at different poetry events around town.

Empathy...I get it now

One of the most fascinating blogs I have found is written by a Grady Doctor in Atlanta.

PS to my STUCK Post

The Stuck post was kind of timely in a weird way.  Celine Dion's husband Rene is dying..and when they interviewed her,

Ahhhh....it's 1991 again

I was transported back to 91 again this weekend. I debated whether to write about this. So Back in 1991, I was in love with "Philly". At that time, I was active duty and was stationed on a ship that went in the shipyards in Philadelphia.  I met Philly a little before that (sometime in 1990) when I was stationed in Norfolk and burning up the highway between PA and VA since that is where my mom lived.  So while I was stationed at home, we became inseparable.

I have a Dream

Happy MLK Day, Bloggers!

Everything that has been accomplished started with a dream.  Think about it...

• The Wright brothers, dreamed of flying, their dream changed travel as we know it.  Where it used to take weeks to get somewhere by boat, it now takes hours by flight.
• Henry Ford dreamed of a faster way to get around than horse and buggy, cars and motorized transportation are now a part of our everyday lives. 

Martin Luther King had a dream, too.  While on the surface, it may seem as if we have achieved his dream, we really haven't.  We still don't have total equality.  Men and women are still treated different in the workplace.  There is still disparity in pay whether by gender, race or sexual orientation.  Yes, we do have a black president, but there are still those who won't judge him on the content of his character because they can't get pass the color of his skin.   Instead of focusing on what he has accomplished, they focus on what is still messed up.  Truth be told, it is stuff that was raggedy when he took office but those who want to show him in a negative light won't acknowledge that part.  There are still those that have a voice and a vote in congress that would rather see the country go down in flames than support an idea put on the table by Barack Obama.  Yes, we have come a long way since Martin had a dream, but we still have a very long way to go. 

I will leave you with one of my most requested spoken word pieces :

Color of Skin

GIPSEE 

_{Copyright © 2004}

You put on your fancy suits and ties,

And think that makes you different in their eyes?

Doesn’t matter that you speak eloquently

Doesn’t matter how many degrees

Or how you try to appease…

You’re living in a fantasy…

But you don’t have to take it from me…

Society doesn’t care what’s within…

They still look at the color of your skin.

Walking around like a corporate clone

Like you belong

Look at every milestone…

What about the chances you have blown…

To strengthen your backbone

Who coulda’ known

That you weren’t  so strong?

When your life hit a tailspin

Looking where you have been

You realize it’s still the color of your skin.

You are naïve

If you believe

That as equal you can even be perceived

Your freedom they still bereave

When you long to be free

Are you any different from me?

Look at it through thick and thin

It still the color of your skin.

Working in the fields you don’t do

But you still don’t have a clue

From the cradle to the grave

You are still just a slave.

Instead of whips and chains

They use your desire to obtain

What you think are the same

Rights in the game

But the fact remains, lamebrain,

All they hold for your is disdain

Are you insane?

In spite of your chagrin…

It is still the color of your skin.

Thanks and Giving

Good morning, Blog Family,

We are about to kick off my favorite time of year: the holiday season. I have so many reasons why I love this season, and here are just a few.

The excitement of Christmas that showed in my children's eyes when they were younger. I have always LOVED Christmas and tried to instill the love of the season in them. Long before I got to know God on a one on one basis, I knew the Christmas story. While I didn't understand the significance of God giving of Himself to the world, I did understand that I was giving something to people that I really cared about and loved. When I was a child, it may have been an art project that I spent hours on before lovingly wrapping it for my mom. Or saving to get my sister a doll or some lip gloss. I just wanted to give to them out of love.

In all the giving, I learned to be thankful. Thankful for the little things. Thankful that my mom remembered that I wanted those Chic jeans. Thankful that I had food to eat. Growing up overseas in impoverished countries during my elementary school years, I saw people hungry and without the basics like food and shelter. My mom would cook and we would have people over to laugh and share our gratefulness for God's Grace and Mercy.

This year is bittersweet for me, I still want to get into the holiday spirit. I still want to be thankful, but it's hard to be thankful while in grief. My mom went home to be with the Lord October 28th. Thanksgiving was a day that I would hear "hurry up and chop those bell peppers." or "Cut those sweet potatoes for the candy yams" or "MzNewy, you are always so slow shredding that cheese." Mom was a drill sargeant leading the troops in the kitchen for Thanksgiving. I am thankful that my mom is out of pain. I am grateful for the time I had with her, but this year, I thought I can't do the whole dinner thing. This year, I planned to sit quietly and reflect of Thanksgivings gone by missing the matriarch of our family. I think mom wouldn't want that, so I am going to do what she always did: I am going to get up and give of myself in the kitchen, thankful for all of the things she taught me, grateful for the good memories. Afterall, it's about Thanks and Giving.


This has been another Newy perspective.