Yay me!

Good morning Blogland.  After the snow and ice of last week here in Atlanta, I spent the weekend getting back on the audition track.  I got a callback for a second audition on January 29.  Well, I take supporting roles and minor stuff because...are you ready for this?  I am afraid of success.

   I used to think I was afraid of failing, but I am afraid of exceeding beyond measure. To be honest, I don't know if I want to give up a 9-5 for a dream.  I am too old to still be "looking for myself".   *sigh*  I am excited about the opportunities but afraid to commit to anything that will change the way I "do business as usual". I know, I often say "take a chance"  "step out on faith" but in reality right now I'm thinking "Don't be no fool."  I am listening for God to tell me which way to go and I swear to Bob He has not said "Girl quit yo' job"  Maybe it's just me but I like little things like food and shelter, so until then I will be your friendly neighborhood extra who may or may not even get credited in the billing but I am having fun doing what I do. 

Make it a great Thursday, Blogland.

Did you know....I had a crush on you?!??!?!

So I was on FB(as usual) and I got a friend request from someone I went to middle/early high school with a gazillion years ago.  We exchanged the usual "What have you been up to/cute kids/what do you do now/where are you living" pleasantries. 

Now there is something you have to understand about MzNewy : I was homely looking in middle and high school...

Umm yeah I was the nerdy studious chic  with the big glasses that sat in the front of the class.  So what tumbled out of his mouth next sent me into a fit of giggles.  He said I had a crush on you back in school.  I couldn't help it this was me at his revelation  ---->  For real....I know what I looked like back then.  I was a late bloomer.   I then asked him if he needed those coke-bottle glasses I used to wear.  But you know, he said some things that he remembered about me from waaaaaaaaaaaay back then that the only way he would have paid that much attention was if he WAS crushing me.   Wow...who knew.  That just goes to show you never know WHOSE type you are, even when you are homely looking.  Here is to 1986,  to a simple place in time when music was music and the shy kid in the back of the class had a crush on the nerd in the front. 

Enough Already!!!!!

Happy New Year!!!!!!!

 

I don't know about you but some days I look around and I say "When do you say ENOUGH ALREADY????" I mean really, we see cheating senators, governors, golfers, bus drivers, cabbies and just plain old everyday joes...the first thing some of the BBW (Bitter Bewildered Women) I know say is "That couldn't be me...I couldn't be on a string like that....I wish my man would cheat on me I would...." Then I look at them and straighten the spine on my five foot two frame and say "You would what?"

They often continue with the neck-snapping-tongue-clicking tirades of "put his stuff out" "take half" and "change my number", forgetting who they are talking to. Forgetting I am the same chic doing night time ride-bys with them to see "if there is a car in the drive-way" (there was) cause he wasn't answering the phone. On the way over she ranted of leaving, cutting up clothes he left at her house, breaking his favorite cologne and even cheating herself. Yet her composure cracked and the facade faded when seeing an unfamiliar car in the driveway. Those same sisters that throw rocks live in glass houses themselves. It's easy to tell someone else to leave, but harder to follow the same advice.

When it is someone else, there are rants of "what you wouldn't do" ; those same rants are replaced by inconsolable sobs and babblings of "how could he...why would he". They sever the invisible umbilical cord to the one they consider their "lifeblood" only to surgically reconnect it before the wound can even scab over. The scar tissue from the wound never allows them to completely heal as they sever and reconnect so often they become immune to pain.

That is a terrible way to live. But I confess, I too have been there. I too have been the chief of surgery of my own case. Really, you know when he is cheating and you don't need ride-alongs, pictures, text messages or emails to prove it. You know when he is just not moved by you anymore. You know when the sway of your hips just don't do it for him. You know when the late night texts aren't all ___________ "his boy; his mom; his sister" or whomever he inserts in the blank to keep you just close enough that you won't leave but far enough that you won't discover the truth. Hopefully it won't take a golf club, a tree and a late night 911 call for you to say "Enough". Maybe you won't wait for him to disappear for a week only to reappear confessing undying love for someone other than you before you say "Enough".

The sad thing is, the only one that can say Enough is you. Now I am not talking about being insecure and thinking that every hushed call is a secret rendezvous in the making. Not at all, but just remember that we create an environment where it is alright to hate, to steal, to cheat, and to lie if we dress it up with symbols of respectability, dignity and love. It's up to you to say ENOUGH ALREADY!

This has been another Newy perspective.